Understanding my approach
Tools, approaches &
how I work
This page explains the modalities, therapeutic frameworks, and topic areas you’ll see referenced throughout the site — in plain language, no jargon required.
Tools & Techniques
What I use in sessions
These are the practical, evidence-based tools we draw on together. You’ll learn how to use many of them yourself so you can take them into your daily life.
Eye Movement Desensitization & Reprocessing
EMDR is a structured, evidence-based therapy that helps people process and heal from traumatic memories and distressing experiences. Unlike traditional talk therapy, EMDR uses bilateral stimulation — guided through eye movements, tapping, or sounds — to help the brain reprocess stuck memories so they no longer trigger intense emotional responses.
It is particularly effective for trauma, PTSD, anxiety, and the underlying pain that drives addictive patterns. I am Level 2 trained in EMDR with advanced clinical training and over 25 years of experience using it — meaning I work with EMDR at a depth well beyond introductory practice.
Emotional Freedom Technique — Tapping for emotional regulation
EFT, often called "tapping," is a body-based technique that involves gently tapping on specific acupressure points on the face and body while focusing on a thought, feeling, or physical sensation. It works by calming the nervous system's stress response — the same fight-or-flight reaction that gets activated by anxiety, anger, and overwhelm.
One of the things I love most about EFT is that it's a skill you take home. Clients learn to use it on their own between sessions — in the car, before a difficult conversation, or in the middle of a stressful moment at work.
Presence as a practice
Mindfulness is the foundation of everything I do in therapy. It means paying attention to what is happening right now — in your body, noticing your feelings and thoughts, your experience — without judgment in this moment. It sounds simple, but for most people it is a genuine skill that takes real practice to develop.
In our work together, mindfulness shows up as a sequence: noticing what is happening and what reactions are arising, creating a pause to reflect on what you are experiencing, and then considering what action — if any — actually serves you. That pause between noticing and acting is where real change lives. We break free of stories we create and get into what is real in the moment.
The body knows before the mind does
We carry our experiences in our bodies. Tension in the shoulders, tightness in the chest, a knot in the stomach — these are not random physical sensations. They are the body's way of communicating what the mind has not yet put into words.
Somatic awareness means learning to slow down and listen to those signals. In our work together, I will often invite you to notice what is happening physically as feelings and experiences arise. This is a practical skill that builds over time — the more fluent you become in your body's language, the earlier you can catch what is happening. The body is not the enemy. It is one of your most reliable guides.
Pause, Breathe, Reflect — in-the-moment skills
Real change often happens in a single moment — the one between the first feeling or reaction, making meaning of it, and acting on it. We have a first reaction, which is mostly not our choice — it just happens. But in the next moment, there is an opportunity. That is where Pause, Breathe, Reflect comes in.
We practice the pause so we can get grounded, observe our own process, and reflect before we decide to speak or act. It allows space for compassion and understanding — and then considering our response from a clearer place, reconnecting with our values and how we want to be.
Changing your inner voice
Our inner voice often reflects our fears or worries. This voice can rehash old stories of mistakes, tell you what could happen next or what to be concerned about. It often tells a story that is not true. This inner voice can also absorb messages we got about ourselves early in life — from family, experience, and culture — and those messages become an inner narrator that runs on autopilot.
Catching these stories and replacing them with the truth is a practice we will engage in together. This is not about positive thinking for its own sake — it is about rewiring the brain, learning to talk to yourself the way you would talk to someone you genuinely care about, and building a more honest and compassionate inner voice over time.
When real feelings arrive, the real work begins
We spend much of our lives in the past or the future — replaying what happened, anticipating what might. The practice of coming into the present moment is one of the most fundamental teachings of mindfulness and the Buddhist tradition. It is not just a therapy technique. It is a way of being.
To be in the moment is to see things clearly — what is actually true right now, not the story we are telling about it. It grounds us, brings us back from worry and rumination, and opens us to genuine connection with ourselves and the people around us. In the therapy room and out in the world, this practice becomes a touchstone: something to return to when life pulls you away from yourself.
Change is not just insight — it is practice
Understanding why you do something is a good start. Actually doing something different — repeatedly, in the moments that count — is where change lives. Skills practice is the bridge between knowing and doing.
Skills are practiced both inside and outside of sessions. I may ask you to try something specific between appointments — a new self-talk phrase, a pause before reacting, a body-based practice when stress spikes. The repetition is the point. Mistakes and stumbles are not failures — they are data, and each one gives us another opportunity to understand, update, and keep practicing. This is also how emotion regulation develops — learning to notice when your nervous system is dysregulated, developing real skills to help yourself in the moment, and finding your way back to a calm place
Understanding why changes everything
One of the most powerful moments in therapy is when something that has felt shameful, confusing, or simply broken about you suddenly makes sense.
Psychoeducation means bringing knowledge into the room — about how the brain processes trauma, how nervous system responses are wired, how patterns from childhood can persist into adult life, why anxiety spikes or depression flattens, what happens in the body under stress. This is not a lecture. It is information offered in the service of understanding and self-compassion.
When you understand that your reaction is not a character flaw but a learned response — or a nervous system doing exactly what it was trained to do — the shame lifts. And from that clearer place, real change becomes possible.
Therapeutic frameworks
How I approach the work
These are the theoretical frameworks and evidence-based models that shape how I think about people, relationships, and change. I draw on all of them rather than following any single approach rigidly — because no one framework fits every person.
Building on what you already have
Rather than focusing primarily on what's broken or what's wrong, strength-based therapy starts from the premise that you already have resilience, skills, values, and life experience that can be resources in your healing. My job is to help you identify and build on those strengths — not to fix you, but to help you access more of what's already there.
This includes your cultural heritage and history. The traditions, values, stories, and ways of navigating the world that come from your background are not incidental to the work — they are part of it. Who your people are and where you come from is a source of strength we can draw on together.
What Happened To You — Not What Is Wrong With You
One of the most painful things about trauma is feeling like something is fundamentally wrong with you. Shifting from "what is wrong with me?" to "what happened to me?" is one of the most important moves we make together.
Trauma-informed care brings into awareness the patterns, reactions, survival strategies, and struggles that were once necessary and adaptive — and may now be getting in the way. It means creating safety first and moving at your pace.
Healing trauma engages the brain, mind, and body. EMDR works directly with the brain's neuroplasticity — helping reprocess stuck traumatic memories so they no longer trigger overwhelming responses.
Rewriting the stories we tell ourselves
Narrative therapy is based on the idea that we make sense of our lives through stories — and that the stories we tell about ourselves powerfully shape how we feel and what we think is possible. When those stories are limiting, narrative therapy helps us examine, challenge, and rewrite them.
Finding your own reasons to change
Motivational Interviewing is a collaborative, client-centered approach that helps people explore their own ambivalence about change and find their own motivation to make it. Rather than telling you what you should do, it helps you discover what you actually want — and what's getting in the way. It's particularly useful in recovery work and any situation where someone feels stuck or conflicted about change.
Learn more: Motivational Interviewing (motivationalinterviewing.org) →
Research-based couples work
The Gottman Method is a couples therapy approach developed by Dr. John Gottman, based on over 40 years of research on what makes relationships work and what causes them to fail. It focuses on building friendship and intimacy, managing conflict constructively, and creating shared meaning. I draw on Gottman-informed principles in my couples work.
Understanding who we choose and why
Imago Relationship Therapy, developed by Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt, is based on the idea that we unconsciously choose partners who reflect our earliest relationships — and that our conflicts are actually opportunities for healing and growth. It emphasizes empathy, dialogue, and understanding the deeper needs underneath surface conflicts.
Cognitive Behavioral Therapy — Connecting thoughts, feelings, and actions
CBT is one of the most widely researched and effective forms of therapy. It's based on the connection between thoughts, feelings, and behaviors — and the understanding that changing how we think about something can change how we feel and act. I use CBT principles particularly for anxiety, depression, and the cycles of self-criticism that keep people stuck.
Still have questions?
Let’s talk.
A free 20-minute consultation is the best way to find out if we’re a good fit. You ask questions too — this goes both ways.